Well I am glad it is Tuesday. Yesterday I was really tired and really grumpy during work... uhhh, I was so so tired. All the extra hours, all the packing, moving, unpacking and trying to stay up on the day to day just totally caught up with me and I was just done. It took sooo much energy to NOT say some of the things that I wanted to say to the people that I have to work with lol I am soo soo glad I have developed the act of pausing when agitated, and restraint of tongue, pen, email and text!
So now, I am suckin down my second coffee, Iz is sleeping peacefully in my lap... aaaah it feels like a good day
earlier this morning I was battling some negative thoughts about some people who have not lived up to my expectations ( Thank you Mary Christine) Before I read her blog this morning, my program was kicking in, and I was asking God to save me from being angry, and come to acceptance on these relationships. - then I read her blog and she posted something along the lines of, not judging, or throwing away people because they don't live up to our expectations... sooo rang true for me. :) OK then I will not throw these relationships away... I will just be patient, and loving, and understanding... and let time heal...
Sometimes I feel like, I need to keep people at a safe distance, and that is just to protect myself. Sometimes I feel like, what is the point to friendships???
But I know I have loved the feeling of having close friendships. The feeling of belonging, the feeling of mattering to someone, the feeling of someone else mattering to me- So I take the good with the bad, and just accept people are falible. Yes, sometimes I don't like how when they act NOT the way I want them to... hahahha and sometimes it is Ok to let people go, and sometimes I just need to be patience while others grow, or I need to grow
So I don't know if this blog even makes sense this morning... oh well. I get it
So for today, gonna focus on whats in front of me, work, dinner, home group... tonight is my new home group's traditions play, I am very excited about it!
happy Tuesday
PS Mary Christine thank you for your comment on welcoming me back... lol I have forgotten or blogger has changed, 1, I didn't know I had a comment, 2 when I found it, I accidental deleted it ahahhaha I will get it again :)
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3 comments:
I understand the distance thing with friendships.Maybe it's something about some of who are still learning to be friends with ourselves.Either way I am grateful to have somebody like you I can truly call a friend,Shay.I trust you.I see you.
I adore you.
Welcome back to the Blogsphere.
xo
Thanks Tab, I think you nailed it... it is about me learning how to be friends with myself... there is a lot of truth to that! I am grateful for you too ♥ I see you!
It is a lifetime's work - all this stuff.
Take care...
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